Today was a lackadaisical day. I had therapy and needed to get up at 910am. Hubby was going to be in at work by 8am, so he kissed me while I was still sleeping, made sure the alarm was set for me, and left. I woke up to the alarm. Baby and I were snuggled back to back, Helen was behind my knees and Dahlylia was on my tummy pillow. Quite an entanglement to get out of to shut off the alarm. Then I cuddled everyone for a little bit before getting out of bed.
I got dressed, checked the bed and under the mattress for bedbugs, didn't see any, so decided we would give the sheets a second night. No bites on me. I left for therapy after telling everybody I would feed them when I got back home.
I talked to Steve at therapy about how to overcome this madness I have at Frank for not only bringing in the bedbugs, but letting the problem get so out of hand that it spread. It's affected me physically and mentally, on a daily basis. To his face, I have not said anything to him, I don't see a point to that. The only think it would do if I told him how angry and disgusted I am with him, would have the possible outcome of him moving out, and the damage is already done. His moving out wouldn't help anything, but make it worse. We are dependent on the money he gives us for food and bills. We would be more screwed if he was to leave. Steve said he understood that and thinks I am right. He said I am in the middle of the bedbug war and it's really hard to forgive someone while you are still suffering through the situation. This may take months, a year, before I can do that. OK, not what I wanted to hear, but good to know that me not being able to let it go and just trust Frank to take care of things is a normal response. He violated the safety of my home for me. This is going to take time to repair.
I also had a thought. God sent me bedbugs so I would become a better wife and finally have an uncluttered home. And by better wife, I mean a better housewife who actually does housework now. I do laundry several times a day, vacuum every other day, and am downsizing all my belongings.
I found several aps on my phone for selling sites to get rid of stuff. Everything is thoroughly cleaned and inspected that I am putting up for sale, and none of it has come from the two rooms that bedbugs have been located it. I am hoping to make some money to catch up on the bills that we couldn't pay having to deal with the bedbugs. And clear out stuff that I don't use anymore.
Tomorrow I am going to use my new breadmaker. I'm going to see if it has a recipe for making rolls, so it will process the dough, then I will pull it out and make hot dog buns out of it. Tomorrow I'm going to make Kari's Dogs for dinner. Spoiler: it contains bacon!
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